The Misadventures Of Veteran Mercenary
by Veteran Mercenary
Summary: A RED team Soldier, Veteran Mercenary, gets blasted into Equestria by a rainbow. How will he deal with this peaceful world, and what is this new feeling he is dealing with around a certian cyan Pegasus? Rated M for various reasons.
1. Meet the Veteran Mercenary

The Misadventures Of Veteran Mercenary

Prologue - Meet the Veteran Mercenary

In the shadows, a Spy waited. Most of the enemy team had passed by. Now was his perfect moment. Moving in silent as a shadow,  
>blending in with his enemies, he could easilly take them down with a chainstab. Just as he was about to take out the Soldier in front of him, the Soldier whirled around and blasted off his head with a shotgun burst.<p>

"You do not take out my team today, COWARD!"

The Soldier is me, Veteran Mercenary. It was just another day at 2fort, and i had just began to start enjoying it, as there was plenty of cold, hard cash waiting for me at days end, when something caught my eye. Turning my head toward the light, I was partially blinded as i looked at the rainbow. Instinctively, a reflex that had practically been created in my head from the beginning of my life, I looked back to the battle. Bad mistake. I, and the rest of both teams who hadnt killed one another,  
>got blasted by the rainbow. As I was hit, a curious sensation flooded through me. It felt like the teleporters my Engineer team mate built, only with less science in it, and... Magic? Parts of me started shutting down, and I was soon left in darkness. <p>


	2. Meet the Mane 6 and Schadenfreude

Chapter 2 - Meet the mane 6 and Schadenfreude

Awakening in pain, mild concussion, and with a minor tingly feeling on my back, my first reaction was to look around.  
>I was in a forest, which probably wasnt anywhere near 2fort, and probably not even on earth. "Verdammt! Wo zur Holle ich bin?"<br>came ringing out from the trees, followed by the sound of branch being torn apart, then, with one final loud smash, one of my favourite medic buddys came walking into view. The conversation pursued as follows.

"Schadenfreude! You are here also?"  
>"Ja, Kamerade, But vhere is here?"<br>"I recognise this place from the My Little Pony cartoon show!"  
>"Didnt take jou to be ze brony type."<br>"Shows how much you know me. By the way, could you drop the accent? I think the typer is getting sick of typing your accent."  
>"Vat ze FUCK, Merc! jou are implying that ve are in a story! Besides, ze accent is not something i can remove."<br>"And this is the man who healed me up from nothing more then a pile of ash."  
>"Ja. Zere are things in live zat ve-"<br>"SSH! I heard something!"  
>"Birds."<br>"Best we are cautious though."

Right about then, 2 things occured. 1 - a group of multicoloured ponies walked into the clearing, and 2 - Me and Schadenfreude simutaneously pulled out a Defender class shotgun and a Titanium bonesaw, Respectively.

12 pony eyes and 4 human ones instantly looked into one another, and 2 human voices said "Friend or Foe?", as was me and Schadenfreudes usual response. The pony i recognized as Twilight Sparkle replied, "Friend, unless you wish to cause harm, then Foe!"  
>Sheathing my Defender class shotgun, which i had custom made from obsidian, diamond, quartz, and steel, and signalling for Schadenfreude to sheath his Titanium bonesaw, I replied with "If we meant harm, then we would have done so earlier! Now, let us all come in peace, for i do not like the way this forest gleams with evil, and I wish to find some form of civillization."<p>

"Not until that creature puts away his weapon!"

This sparked a very bad response from Schadenfreude, and I ended up having to knock him out to stop him killing the ponies.

"Our species has a name, you know. We call ourselves humans, and I strongly suggest not calling Schadenfreude a creature."  
>"Whats his problem?"<br>"He doesnt like being grouped up with non-human life. I find that a bit discriminative myself, but that is how he is."  
>"Well, since he wont be much of a problem now, perhaps we can take you to ponyville!"<br>"Gladly!"

Thats how our adventure started, how Schadenfreude got a reputation among ponies as reactive, and how I knocked out my friend and loyal comerade to save the lives of 6 sentient ponies. 


	3. Getting to know one another

Chapter 3 - Sociallising with the 6

"Schadenfreude, GET UP! Its time that we and the 6 get to know one another!"

The words I yelled right into his ear didnt wake him from his hour long time of being knocked out.

"Dammit! He is usually loads more responsive. I must have hit him rather hard..."

Me, Schadenfreude, and the Mane 6 were at Twilights library. Twilight, Fluttershy, and I were trying to wake Schadenfreude.  
>I have no idea what the 3 other ponies were doing, but it sounded like they were discussing things. Wait... 3?<p>

"PINKIE PIE! GET BACK IN THIS STORY RIGHT NOW!"

BAM! A pink portal randomly opened right next to me, and out stepped Pinkie Pie, giggling slightly.

"You better have not ruined the 4th wall..."  
>"Hey! 4th wall demolition spechialist! What else can I do?"<br>"You can go into the background, with the other 3."  
>"Okey dokey!" and Pinkie bounced over to the 3 ponies, who had moved to arguing.<p>

This little mishap had the positive effect of waking Schadenfreude, and the negative effect of getting strange looks from both Schadenfreude and Twilight.

"What? A story can have as many characters that break the 4th wall as it can have characters."  
>"Its just weird, creepy, and makes you seem mentally insane."<br>"Maybe its because I am, and maybe also because the typer has rather bad grammar."  
>"I told you to stop."<br>"Actually, look back earlier in the text. It doesnt tell me anywhere to stop, except there, but that doesnt count."

By now, we were ready to sociallise.

"I think its spelt sociallize, Typer."

OK, OK. No need to be so fussy. Jeez. Anyway, we were ready to sociallize, or whatever.

"So, first things first. I already know you 6," I said the moment we were all gathered, "but Schadenfreude does not. Could you all introduce yourselves to him?"

We started with Twilight, as she seemed like the leader of the group.

"Schadenfreude, this is Twilight Sparkle. If that is a bit much to say, or, in the writers case, type, then you can shorten it down to Twilight, or even just Twi. Twilight, this is Schadenfreude. He is, back where we are from, the RED team medic,  
>and quite a good one. He actually healed me back up from so little as a pile of ash!"<p>

A simple nod was exchanged, and a flash of admiration. Clearly, they did not fully trust one another. Moving on to Rarity.

"This is Rarity. She owns a boutique (clothing store) in this town, so if you need a new pair of clothes, for any reason, just ask her! Rarity, this is Schadenfreude. He is, back where we are from, the RED team medic, and quite a good one."

Again, a simple nod. Only natural, seeing as they had just met, and Schadenfreude had tried to kill them, back in the forest.

"Over here is Pinkie Pie. I cant remember everything about her, but I remember that she works at Sugarcube Lane. Pinkie, th-"  
>"Oh, I already know. Schadenfreude, right? And he is the RED medic, and really good a-"<br>"OK, OK, WE GET IT!"

Pinkie Pie, being Pinkie Pie, bounced around the place and Pinkie Promised to prepare Schadenfreude a party. During this time,  
>I had a brief sense of Deja Vu.<p>

"The pony wearing a cowboy hat would be Applejack. Her entire family makes a living from apple based products! AJ, this is Schadenfreude. He is the RED teams medic."

I managed to catch a brief exchange of a glance between them, though of what, I dont know.

"No prizes for guessing which one is Rainbow Dash."  
>"Ze one vith ze rainbow mane?"<br>"Correct! Unfortunately, as stated, no prizes. She is the only recorded one to have broken the sound barrier without use of technology! Dash, this is Schadenfreude. Back from where we are from, he was, and still is, the best medic RED team had.

I caught a tomboyish grin from Dash, a slightly disturbing grin from Schadenfreude, and an emotion I didnt know about reflect and bounce inside me.

"The shy one over there would be fluttershy. She takes care of the wildlife around these parts. I suggest you dont scare her too much, or she may use the Stare on you, and that doesnt end well for the receiver. Shy, meet Schadenfreude, AKA the best RED team medic on record." Leaning over and whispering quietly, I added "Oh, and if he is any trouble, use the Stare on him."

Well, what would you expect from Fluttershy? A loud "HELLO!"? She hasnt got shy in her name for nothing.

"And thats that sorted. Mostly. I will fill you in on characters I recognize as you meet them.""  
>"Ja. I think i got zat."<p>

Thats how Schadenfreude and the Mane 6 got to know one another, how I discovered the secrets behind Pinkie Pies 4th wall demolition, and how I also discovered the first of my... Feelings... for Rainbow. 


	4. What to eat and a house

Chapter 4 - Need A House Here! and solving the food issues.

"So... Where are you humans going to stay?"  
>"Um... Didnt think of that."<p>

It was just a short time before (apparently) lunch, and the 8 of us were talking about housing.

"We could try building a house near the everfree."  
>"Iz zat vot ze forest is called?"<br>"Yes, and its not safe, so couldnt you build it near town?"  
>"Not safe? On what level?"<br>"Loads of creatures. Most of them are safe, but there are ones that could easilly take a small town."  
>"Hm... I could use the practice. Something tells me that we will soon be fighting many tough enemies."<p>

Just then, it hit lunchtime.

"So, what in the ways of food exists here?"  
>"Apples, flower sandwiches, hay, that sort of stuff."<br>"I think i might stick to my ration K type unit boxes."  
>"Zat explains ze smell of some of ze stuff jou eat, Merc!"<p>

thud.

"OW! Vat ze hell vaz zat vor?"  
>"I dont like people hating my ration Ks."<br>"And what will Schadenfreude eat?"  
>"Uh... This is awkward. He usually eats... er... meat."<p>

6 collective gasps of horror echoed around the room.

"But not always. He sometimes eats Heavys sandvich, but usually when he gets hurt badly, by, say, a rocket."  
>"Okay. He can eat sandwiches then, assuming sandvich and sandwich are as similar as they sound."<br>"Thats the food problem sorted, until I run out of ration Ks."  
>"What will you eat after those are gone?"<br>"If my memory serves correctly, and there are manticores in the everfree, then probably manticore flesh."  
>"By the way, whats in the ration Ks?"<br>"Stuff that you probably wont want to know about, such as bonemeal."  
>"Now, can ve start solving ze house issue?"<br>"Okay. Location should be the everfree, as we need the practice."  
>"Lets get started zen!"<p>

One short walk (Flight for Rainbow, Fluttershy, bounce for pinkie, and rocket jump for me, in which I found out about the wings I had acquired during the event that had teleported me here) later, at the everfree.

"Cant just magic items out of the air, so we will have to get items to build a house."  
>"Way ahead of jou, Merc!"<p>

Schadenfreude had already made a crafting table, mined some stone, made a crude stone axe, and collected a pile of wood.

"HEY! Leave some of the interesting for me!" I shouted out to him, before shotgunning down a tree.

Some harvesting, arguing, breaking of tools, reloading of a shotgun, Bringing down of a manticore, and building later...

"Not the best house ever, but it should do fine."

All 8 of the collective 2 groups were now looking at the result of large amounts of wood, some stone, and manticore hide.

"Protects against the wind, at least."  
>"Why would you need protection against the wind?"<br>"Because of reasons that should be obvious, like the chill wind can make."

That was how we sorted out the food, built a house, and further damaged the ponies good views on Schadenfreude. 


	5. Time alone and new emotions

Chapter 5 - Time alone and new emotions

Things werent so bad here, but there was almost nothing to do, barring dueling and manticore hunting. Schadenfreude came in, and saw me sitting there, with a sad face on.

"Merc, vhy ze long face?"  
>"There is nothing to do here, and our comrades are probably getting their butts kicked back in our world."<br>"I am sure zey are fine."  
>"Knowing BLU and their insane heavymedic rush tactics, probably not."

After finishing this small conversation, I got up.

"Vhere are jou going?"  
>"For a walk. I wish to be alone."<p>

Walking out the front door of our house, I walked along the trail. The scenery was astonishing in the everfree. Most of the friendly animals waved, and I waved back. Suddenly, I realised that this wouldnt last, and my spirits fell again. I entered a very dark section, and then walked into light again, then dark. I walked for an age, and would have probably kept on with my long, pointless journey, had Rainbow Dash not landed nearby. Cue unknown emotion, and slight embarassment.

"Why are you so far out here?" She asked, with detectable curiosity in her voice.  
>"There is nothing to do back at the house, so I figured i would go for a walk." I replied.<br>"Isnt it scary out here for you?"  
>"If I was scared, then I wouldnt be walking. I would be rocket jumping."<p>

Something inside me sparked into life, and I soon found myself flying.

"Or flying."

That small statement got a grin of embarassment out of me.

"I dont remember having wings in my old world, but then again, I dont know how I got here, in THIS world."  
>"Flying must be a new thing to you. Would you like some help with it?"<br>"I have no idea what i am doing, so... Yeah, sure, I guess."

One flying lesson (and a crash) later...

"I think I got most of what to do now. Thanks for your help."  
>"No problem, and try not to crash."<br>"Nothing much to do here now. Would you like to join me on my walk?"  
>"Ok, but why?"<br>"I would like the company. That, and you look quite attractive."  
>"Er... Thanks, I guess?"<p>

Thats how I got some time to myself, how Rainbow taught me to fly, and how she also discovered my crush on her. 


	6. Meet the Antagonist

Chapter 6 - Meet the Antagonist

(Somewhere in hell)

"PRISONER ESCAPED!"

There was chaos in the darksteel prison. A dangerous prisoner had escaped, by murdering the guards with the same lockpick that he had used to pick the lock. In the shadows, the same prisoner waited, for something unknown.

"These worlds will regret the day they made an enemy of me."

The prisoner was often referred to as Tribalsniper. He, despite being primitave, in comparison to the rest of many worlds, was an incredibly tough enemy, due to factors such as his extreme durability, tribal knowledge, and sheer strength.

"Especially this world. Equestria will be razed, and that I will make sure of."

(Somewhere in the everfree forest)

"...And that is how I learned not to underestimate any opponent." I finished telling one of my stories to Rainbow, who, despite the violence of the world I had talked about, seemed interested.

Just then, we got back to the house, which Schadenfreude had taken to referring to as "The Fort".

"Jou vere out zere for ages, Merc! Vhat took you so... oh." Schadenfreude had obviously seen that I was not as alone as I had been when I had started my walk, and had taken quite swiftly to laughing his head off at me, while I just stood there, slightly embarassed.

"Er... This probably isnt what you think it is."  
>"I think it is that jou have taken a liking to Dash!"<p>

Cue embarassment, and minor blushing from both me and Rainbow.

"Uhh..."

Just before I could get any more humiliated, a loud explosion rocked through the land.

"Iz zat an earthquake?"  
>"Probably not. It didnt feel like one, at least."<br>"Remember me?" Said a cold, brutal voice, one that I instantly recognised as...  
>"TRIBALSNIPER?"<br>"Quite correct. I didnt expect you to be in this world, but no matter. You wont be too significant a bump in the overall plan I have for this world."  
>"Let me guess... Total destruction of everything here?"<p>

Tribalsniper backflipped into the room via the roof, gave a dark, chilling grin, and replied, "You always were so good at guessing games, back at 2fort."  
>"HOLD. IT. RIGHT. THERE. I am NOT going to let you simply WALTZ ON IN and DESTROY EVERYTHING!"<br>"Feel free to try, but you will probably die."  
>"That actually rhymes, even with that horrid australian accent."<br>"Merc, jou know zat is rascist, right?"  
>"So? When a story gets written about these adventures, it will be rated M anyway. Might as well."<br>"I like your thinking, Mercenary. If you only hadnt made an enemy of me, we could have gotten on well."

With that parting shot, he was gone.

"That Tribalsniper is quite nimble..." Dash said quietly.  
>"I think everyone here knows that, and also that he wants to destroy this world. any thoughts?<br>"We could get the other elements of harmony."  
>"Good idea, but he is not of this world, and also has incredible power."<br>"Just how much power?"  
>"He used nothing more then his bow to take down an entire fortress."<p>

That was how the darksteel prison lost its reputation as unescapable, how Schadenfreude found out about... certian emotional happenings, and how a major disaster plotted its course for Equestria. 


	7. First fight, combat ponies, and RM

Chapter 6 - First fight, combat ponies, and Rainbow Mercenary

Twilight and Rainbow as well as me and Schadenfreude were at "The Fort", trying to come up with a way of defeating Tribalsniper.

"Theoretically, due to him not being from this land, the Elements wont work on him." That was me.  
>"Could give it a shot." Twilight.<br>"It wouldnt do if my theory ended up being right." Me.  
>"Ze risk iz not zat great, so give it a shot!" Schadenfreude.<br>"Why not just knock him out and lock him up?" Rainbow.  
>"You shitting me? Last I heard, he was locked up at Darksteel prison! No bars would be strong enough!" Me.<br>"Zerefore, ve need to outright kill him." Schadenfreude.  
>"Whatever. Lets just take him down before he destroys this world." Me and the ponies, at the exact same time.<br>"Be aware zat Tribalsniper iz not one for mercy. Jou need some sort of defence, or he vill kill you."

Just before anyone (or anypony, in the case of Dash and Twi) could say anything more, a loud scream of pure terror came through the door, followed by the sound of bone being crushed, pain, and finally, zombielike moans.

"Shit. Zombies. Dont let them get you at close range, unless that is your only way of attack."

About 500 zombies swarmed into the room, breaking through the door, smashing through the windows, even dropping down from the roof. In an instant, all 4 of us were launched into combat. We fought them off in our ways.

I was shotgunning them with extremely powerful rounds from my shotgun, and smacking any that got past with my katana, to great effect, while Schadenfreude tore into the zombies with 2 Titanium Bonesaws. I could tell that the ponies were not fighters, but they were holding their own, Twilight throwing the zombies back with magic blasts, and Rainbow stumbling them toward Schadenfreude with strong hits. Out of all us 4, I was the first to encounter real trouble. I ran out of rounds, and zombies converged on me. If I hadnt had a katana, and the ability to fly, I probably would have been brought down quite quickly. As I had both a katana and flight, I was still quite able to tear through zombies. Rainbow was next, when a particularly fleshy zombie stuck to her, and stopped her from flying with its weight. I noticed this, and, abandoning all reason, went over and cut the zombie off her. Wordlessly sending me her thanks, we both went back to the fight. Schadenfreude had taken many hits, but was only now beginning to suffer from them, his reactions slowing, his hits weakening, until, with one last decapacitation, he retreated. Twilight was fine, until a zombie jumped her via the roof. Despite his conditions, Schadenfreude tore the zombie off her.

"No knowing how long we are going to last." I said, slightly tired from slicing the zombies so much.  
>"Ja. My natural regeneration haz its limits, and ze zombies got in many hits." Schadenfreude added.<br>"I wonder if Tribalsniper is having similar problems, and if he is, how well he is doing." I thought.

(Somewhere else in the everfree)

"Take that, you rotten wankers!" Tribalsniper taunted, albeit with similar problems to us. He was out of arrows, and, despite his incredible power, was beginning to tire. There were so many zombies converging on him, and his knifes wounds, which caused bleeding, were pain based, which was useless. He didnt have to worry though, as he was against far fewer zombies, and his incredibly strong back shield stopped all attacks from behind.

(At "The Fort")

The zombies were starting to thin out, but Schadenfreude and Twilight were unconscious from having to use their respective powers for so long, I had only a katana and flight, and both me and Dash were very tired.

"Desperate times call for desperate measures... I remember, back in my world, that there were few who could fuse together, and combine their power. We wont beat the zombies in our states, so perhaps we should try..." I suggested.  
>"If it will work, then, go ahead." Was the response.<p>

A bright light surrounded us both, and when it faded, there stood a man with long, rainbow hair, cyan skin, magenta eyes, and Dark blue wings, as well as a black backpack with a yellow flag and bugle, Veterans custom shotgun (fully loaded), A katana, and multiple grenades everywhere on its red uniform.

"Say hello to Rainbow Mercenary*, zombies!" It said, combining Veterans voice and Rainbows accent, as well as the attitude of both. With a very confident, albeit tomboyish grin, it tore into the zombies like a hurricane. As the katana sliced through zombies, it left a trail of concentrated rainbow liquid, which, in its unconcentrated form, could set fire to the inside of one if ingested. Unluckily for the zombies, it was concentraded. The inside of "The Fort" filled with the sound of incinerating flesh, unearthly screams of pain, and cocky laughter. A short pause filled the air, but was soon filled with the sound of a bugle, then the same noises from before, all of them at least 35% louder. When the noises faded back to their normal volume, the sound of a certian shotgun joined the noise, and a few zombies began running from "The Fort", only to be dragged back in by ropes, screaming loudly, trying to snap the ropes by clawing them, then frightening laughter, the sound of katana on flesh, and silence.  
>The bugle sounded again, and explosions (or "Ze sound of progress" as Schadenfreude called it) tore the air, zombies screaming unearthly screams of terror, and being forcefully silenced.<p>

"As Schadenfreude would say, you case is TERMINAL!" Yelled out the combination voice of Rainbow Mercenary, Killing the last zombie.

"No more? I guess its time to change back. Pity, as I like being this way." Said Rainbow Mercenary, then the sound of unfusion rang out, and Rainbow Mercenary unfused into Rainbow Dash and Veteran Mercenary.

"How was that for coolness?" I asked Rainbow.  
>"That... Was... Coolness to the limit!" Came the adrenaline bolstered reply.<p>

Thats how the first fight of this adventure passed, how 2 peaceful ponies became warriors, and how an incredibly powerful being came into existance.

*Information on Rainbow Mercenary.

The result of Veteran Mercenary and Rainbow Dash fusing into one life, Rainbow Mercenary is an incredibly powerful being. Some consider it anthromorphic, and would be right, but Rainbow Mercenary is human.

Attack capability - Ridiculous Rainbow Mercenary is one of the strongest things in existance when a strong offence is needed. A round from the shotgun is already incredibly strong, and made stronger still should the banner be in effect. The banner, activated by blowing the bugle that comes with it, mysteriously increases the power of the attacks that this form can deal out, as well as any nearby allies to Rainbow Mercenary. The grenades lining the uniform that this fusion wears are easy to pull off, easy to activate, and have devastating effects. Finally, the katana leaves a trail of concentrated rainbow liquid, which is actually strong enough to burn through fire resistance, and will blind you permanently if you get so little as a teaspoon in your eye.

Defence capability - Respectable Rainbow Mercenary cant defend well, but the shotgun is a defencive class of shotgun, and greatly bolsters how well the fusion form can defend. The dark blue wings on Rainbow Mercenarys back are near perfect for fast, agile flight, leaving most enemies at a disadvantage, as flight is not the easiest thing to achive. As mentioned earlier, the katana leaves rainbow liquid when it slashes things, and the pain inflicted by rainbow liquid could ruin an enemys attacks.

Strengths - Incredibly powerful attacks, can fly, far stronger then most non fusion life, very fast, incredible levels of durability and courage.

Weaknesses - Not good at defence, grenades everywhere, doesnt know when to give up, significant disadvantage without any equipment. 


	8. Zombie removal force

Chapter 7 - Zombie removal force

"The zombies that we faced surely did not target us alone." I said, after everyone had recovered.  
>"If Tribalsniper sent zem, zey might..." Schadenfreude pointed out.<br>"I dont think Tribalsniper is that stupid." I countered.  
>"Vatever ze case, ve shouldnt vorry too much."<br>"We should check on the town anyway. If the zombies are not there, then he sent them. I doubt it though..."

(Some time later, at Ponyville)

"Holy..." words failed me.  
>"Zey are everywhere! you vere right, Merc!"<br>"Its cleanup time."

In a simutaneous exchange, me and Dash fused into Rainbow Mercenary again.

"Cool. I vonder if jou two are not ze only ones..." Schadenfreude pondered, just before fusing with Twilight. A dome of purple flashed out from the pair, and when it dispersed...

There stood a man with purple skin, dark purple hair with a streak of light purple in it, wearing a light purple doctors coat, and with his own miniture arsenal of medical weaponry. I saw 2 titanium bonesaws, a syringe gun, a medigun I had never seen before, and a bust of hipocrates. Turning his head up, the man looked at me and said, in a combination of Twilights voice and Schadenfreudes accent...

"Meet Sparklefreude*."

Once I got over the fact that Schadenfreude and Twilight had just fused, I managed to get out a response.

"The zombies are so dead."

A small horde of zombies, drawn in by the purple light given off in the fusion, charged the 2 fusion forms. Syringes flew, shotguns fired, zombies screamed in agony, and the horde was reduced to nothing in seconds. Soon, however, every zombie in the town was drawn to the sound of the fight. Simutaneously, Rainbow Mercenary and Sparklefreude charged into the approaching zombies with battle cries that could give Satan nightmares, and deafen a man with no ears. Bonesaws went through zombie flesh, leaving gaping wounds, which quickly sprouted into a magical purple fire. Soon, however, it was evident that Sparkefreude lacked the firepower of Rainbow Mercenary. The sound of a bugle rang out through the air, followed by rainbow coloured slashes, then the sound of burning flesh being disintegrated. Soon, because of the smell it gave off, zombies were coming from everywhere, quickly overpowering the duo. At the last second, Sparklefreude beamed Rainbow Mercenary with medigun rays, and the pair were surrounded by glowing armor, Sparklefreude having purple armor, and Rainbow Mercenary shining out a rainbow. In seconds, Rainbow Mercenary pulled out his shotgun, and was firing away at an insane rate, with nearly unlimited ammunition. Zombies not close to the duo started to flee, only to be hit with syringes, then dragged back in with ropes, screaming haunting screams.

"That is the art of war, you sissy maggot bags!" rang out Rainbow Mercenarys voice.  
>"Great domination line, comrade!" Sparklefreude commented.<br>"Made that one up myself. It seems to fit the situation, and our enemy."  
>"Not really an enemy anymore."<p>

The charge ended, and both Sparklefreude and Rainbow Mercenary unfused.

"Ve really did zat lot in, didnt ve?" questioned Schadenfreude.  
>"I am suddenly very scared of you, Schadenfreude." commented Twilight Sparkle.<br>"Its only natural. Most of my own team vere scared of me on my first day on a battlefield."  
>"That is an odd medic buddy you have, Merc." Dash said quietly to me.<br>"Cant be picky in a land of constant war." I replied.  
>"Oh... Right. I forgot."<br>"Is it because this land has never known much in the way of war?"  
>"Probably."<p>

I could detect fear in her voice when she said this, and this fear was a strong one.

"If you are scared of me, or scared of Schadenfreude, then you can just say." was all I could offer as comfort.  
>"You and him lived in constant war, never knowing peace. Of course I am scared!" was her reply.<br>"Dont be. I would not bear the though of attacking you." I replied, while giving her a hug.

That was how we cleaned up Ponyville, how we discovered Schadenfreudes fusion form, and how we remembered the past.

*Information on Sparklefreude.

Similarly to Rainbow Mercenary, Sparklefreude is the result of Schadenfreude fusing with Twilight Sparkle. Both fusion forms are excellent in combat, but that is where the similarities end. Sparklefreude is not a fighting based fusion, and is usually reliant on at least one ally. Also, Sparklefreude cannot fly, but can use magic to slow a fall to safe speeds.

Attack capability - Respectable.  
>Sparklefreude is more a support fusion, but can nonetheless be quite powerful. The syringes contain lactic acid, which can dissolve lumps of bone, and can be lethal when it scores a critical hit. The bust of hippocrates can let Sparklefreude see the health of an enemy, and that is an advantage which, combined with the syringes, can be devastating. Like Schadenfreude, Sparklefreude is a brilliant close combat fighter, and wields the titanium bonesaws with similar skill.<p>

Defence capability - Incredible.  
>Sparklefreude has the power to heal, and that can be used to massive effect. Despite natural regen being a trait that all fusion forms have, Sparklefreude has a far stronger regen, capable of fighting off the effects of lactic acid. As mentioned before, hippocrates bust lets Sparklefreude see the health of an enemy, and determine its priority of elimination. The fusion can use magic, such as pushing from far away, and this is an incredible defencive asset.<p>

Strengths - Can use magic. Can ubercharge any allied target. Syringes are incredibly powerful.

Weaknesses - Support based. Syringe gun is badly limited in the way of ammo. Uneffective againt large numbers. 


	9. Ashes to ashes

Chapter 8 - Ashes to ashes

"So... Any idea where the zombies came from?" Twilight asked me.  
>"I dont know. Sometimes, though, zombies would attack both teams, back where I am from." I responded.<br>"Wait... You had to put up with zombies, AND war?" she asked, obviously suprised. "We actually had to, for our employer was not the sort to argue with." I informed.  
>"Ja. Vun of our Spys complained once... Never seen him since." Schadenfreude added.<br>"It wasnt much of a problem, especially for our Pyros, but zombies can see through invisibility." "I have a theory for zat. My theory, is that ze zombies have better perception, to track targets through walls." "It seemed far-fetched of a theory, at first, but then one of our Demos got ambushed by a horde of them."

This last part was spoken out, and coincided with some survivors poking their heads from everywhere.

"No more zombies! This calls for a party!" rang out an instantly recognizable voice.  
>"How did you know those were zombies, Pinkie?" I asked, mildly confused. "You mentioned them in the previous chapter of this book, silly." was about all the response I got.<br>"MPH PH PHH!" cut in a muffled shout.

A nearby wooden wall burned down, and someone I had not thought was here stepped over the ashes.

"Scorch*?" I asked the pyro, not daring to hope...  
>"MMPH." came the muffled confirmation. "How did you get here?" I asked Scorch, relieved that it was him. "MPPH MH MPH MMPH. MPH, MPHH MPHHPH FMMH MPHNPHHH." "Would you mind taking that mask off? Even I didnt understand that."<p>

Scorch peeled off his mask, and looked at me with eyes, eyes which almost seemed to burn.

"What I said was, I took a teleporter to the BLU base, courtesy of our resident ninja engineer. When I got there, this rainbow explosion thing hit me." he explained, 100% more understandable now. "Guess we had better update one another on the situation, while the ponies have a party." I questated**.  
>"Yep. Things were like an outhouse in a tornado trapped in a letterbox on my end, only loads harder to explain." "That description made very little sense." I stated.<br>"Do I, in general, make any sense?" he asked, obviously a rhetorical question. "Good point." "Here probably isnt the best place to say my part of the story." "Well really?" I asked him, my voice almost liquid sarcasm.

Me, Scorch, Schadenfreude, and Rainbow Dash (no idea why she decided to follow) went to "The Fort" to say our bits of the story, and to get some food (I didnt bring anything to eat with me, because who brings food to a zombie killing festival?), each of us racing the others to get there first. It was pretty much a tie between me and Rainbow, with Scorch coming in 3rd, only a second before Schadenfreude got there.

"So, you built your own place to live in?" Scorch asked, quite suprised. "Yes, we did, because firstly, there were no houses near this forest, and secondly, we need the practice on the monsters that lurk there." I confirmed, and also informed. "You are kidding, right?" he asked. "!" I replied, in typical video reference style.

Entering "The Fort", we found a place to talk about things.

"Suprisingly roomy in here, I must say." Scorch noted. "We had a lot of stuff to build with." I explained. "Now, to my story." he said, cutting to the chase quite quickly.

(Note - This next part will not be delivered in speech, but directly from Scorchs memory.)

2Fort, between chapters 2 and 3.

"Scorch, you got any idea how hard it is for us to get anywhere?" questioned a Scout, who had, only moments ago, been headshotted by a Sniper, and had respawned just then. "I know, but Ninjie is working on it, only, even he cannot get a teleporter behind them without us taking fire." I replied.

(For those that somehow didnt notice the earlier brackets, this is Scorchs memory, not mine.)

"Wish that hardhat would hurry up. They have taken our best Heavy out 10 times, already!" "Bear with his plan. It will work." I replied, trying to convince everyone, even myself, that it was true. Ever since our best Soldier, Veteran Mercenary, had turned up missing in action, we had seen a severe nosedive in win/lose ratio.

The Scout rushed out, and was promptly bashed in the face by a fists-of-steel wielding heavy. After what seemed like forever, Ninjies teleporter turned on. Without even a second thought, I walked on it, teleporting into the BLU base.

"He actually did it. Remarkable what he can do." I said, mostly to myself, but also to a Spy on the same team. "Indeed. There must have been at least 5 sentries in this very room at one point." He replied.

Something shining out the corner of my eye, I whipped around, only to be met with a rainbow passing through me, and the mysterious feeling of teleportation.

(This is the part where we return to "The Fort", and the person we are following resets to normal.)

"Quite an interesting series of events." I remarked, glad that at least one of our better troops was still helping our team win, but also, at the same time, dispirited by the fact that we had to suffer such losses. "Ja, that is a very interesting story, but how do we know it is true?" Schadenfreude voice rang out in question. "Explain this." Scorch responded, pointing to something I had not seen before, hanging around his neck. "You first." I responded, not knowing what it was meant to be. "To be honest, I dont know myself, but watch this!" he remarked.

What happened next, I will not forget. Whatever the thing was, perhaps a necklace, began to glow red. As it did, I noticed a burning sound, which was coming from the necklace, then, Scorch himself burst into flame. Quite suprised, I fell over the back of my seat in suprise, then picked myself up, and looking at where Scorch was, to find that he was flying in the air, and that fire was sprouting up, apparently caused by Scorch.

"That is incredible!" I heard 3 voices, including my own, exclaim. "That is nothing. Check this out!" Scorch responded, then threw a fist upward, sending fire high into the air. After doing this, he kicked out with a foot, almost too fast to see, throwing out a missile of lava, which then exploded in a pool of water, evaporating the lot in one go. Rising high in the air, almost too high to see, he then flew downwards, increasing speed rapidly, breaking speeds which would normally tear metal off a plane, then, at the end of his dive, an explosion rang out, and a ring of fire and lava burst out in all directions.

"Howzat?" he asked, now with both feet firmly on the ground.

I think he didnt really need an answer for that, as all 3 of our expressions (obviously not his) told the full tale.

"Now for your story." Scorch said, directly adressing me to tell him. I ended up telling him the contents of this story, up until the point where he came in. Once I had finished telling my story to him, he looked quite amazed, especially the bit where I fused with Rainbow, and Schadenfreude fused with Twilight.

"Do I even need to start on how amazingly hard to believe, yet how incredibly awesome that sounds?" he asked. "No, as a matter of fact, because the hard to believe part..." I said, before me and Rainbow Dash fused into Rainbow Mercenary. "Is now invalid." we completed. With us unfusing into Veteran Mercenary and Rainbow Dash again, Scorch then brought up the topic of food.

"Not this again..." 3 voices, Scorchs voice not included, said together, with unearthly precision.

That is how we exchanged tales with Scorch, discovered his newfound powers, and how we proved to Scorch that our tale was true. How fitting a name for this chapter, considering who the added character is.

*Information on Scorch.

While not initially being a very pleasant character to meet, Scorch is quite a friendly chap, and while he is not a fusion form, he has a power level comparable to one. He has a very appropriate name, as he loves fire more then most other things, and is a very nice person to have as a friend. Some think of him as a living fire, but he is merely a human, with a major love of fire.

Attack capability - Brilliant. Scorch, while not being one for direct combat, has some incredibly powerful methods of attack. When he got teleported into Equestria, he somehow gained incredible power. This power boost now lets him punch out fire, kick lava missiles similar to rockets, fly incredibly fast, and conjure fire out of the air. These attacks can be devastating, particularly against vulnerable targets, as the temperatures of the weakest fire, the flames that surround him, can reach up to 5500 degrees celcius. That is hot enough to outburn most flames in existance, and could feel like at least 15000 celcius in very humid conditions.

Defence capability - Brilliant. Scorch, when he received his new powers, has a natural fire shield, as well as flight. He has cast off the boundries that plagued him once, as he can summon up a very strong fire out of nowhere. Lava missiles are lethal, exploding with a powerful blast on contact with something as nonresistant as water. Fire punches let up flames powerful enough to melt through solid rock, which, on top of Scorchs hand-to-hand combat skill, mean that anyone who attacks him will have a very hard time just staying alive.

Strengths - Very strong fire attacks. Capable of taking a strong beating. Shielded by fire. Fire proof.

Weaknesses - If his enemy is fire resistant, or immune to fire, he will not have such strong effects. Heat seeking missiles, fired by anyone, will automatically home in on him, unless he destroys them with a lava missile. Vulnerable to very strong ice attacks.

**Questating = Combination of telling and asking. 


	10. Ponified

Chapter 9 - Ponified

"Something troubling you, Vet?" Scorch asked me. I was at "The Fort", going through some issues in my mind. "Its just... I dont really wanna say." I replied. "The less you want to talk about it, the worse it is if you dont." He countered. "Fine... Its about Rainbow. I... Its a bit embarassing to talk about, but... I think I love her." "And? That is compleatly normal." "No, it isnt, because she is a pony, and I am a human." "I have an idea. Lemmie get Schadenfreude..."

With that, Scorch disappeared for a short while, only to return with Schadenfreude.

"So, jou are in love vith Dash, ja?" Schadenfreude asked. "Well... Er... Yes. Why?" I replied, noting that it was getting hard to move my wings. "I could build somezing to turn jou into a pony, like her." "Wish I had known earlier. That would have saved me quite some time worrying." "Ja, maybe it vould. How vould I know, though? I am not psychic." "Good point. Perhaps one of us should inform the mane 6, to prevent confusion?" "I will." Scorch said, almost a split second after I finished talking. He then went to inform them. "I vill start ze building, but zere are parts zat I vill need help vith." Schadenfreude stated. "If I didnt help you build the... Whatever it is, then I would have to question my own emotions." I replied.

Just then, Scorch got back from his informing.

"Now zat ve are all here, lets build ze device." Schadenfreude said. "Its a device?" I said, slightly scared of what it might be. "Quite correct. Now, time to get started." he replied.

(I dont want to bore you with the details, so, something like 1 hour later...)

"Not what I though would be used to make me a pony, but, whatever..." I said, staring at what we had built.

If anything, it looked like a poorly built Shotgun.

"Better zen ze alternative." Schadenfreude pointed out. "Are you sure this will work?" asked Scorch, trying to imitate a Heavy Weapons Guy, but failing the Russian accent. "I have no idea!" Schadenfreude replied, flawlessly imitating his voice from the time when he first used an ubercharge. "We didnt built it just to look good, so best see what this does." I said, interrupting them both. "Okay, okay, hold your ponies." Scorch replied, then laughed at his own joke. "Not funny. Not funny at all." I stated. "Didnt have to be for you, it just had to be for me." "Whatever. Lets just get this over with, as I suspect the transformation might hurt."

Schadenfreude aimed the end of the "Poorly Built Shotgun" at me, and hit what would amount to the trigger. The last thing I knew before it hit me was the feeling of my brain predicting unconsciousness. Correctimundo.

"Welcome to the inner sections of your conscious." A voice said. "Is that where I am right now?" I asked it. "Quite right, so dont be suprised if you see some very odd things." "Well, what are you, and who are you?" "I am effectively a greater being, and you can just call me God." "Okay, God, why are you in my mind?" "Why? Because, Veteran, you are up against a greater evil then ever though possible by mortal kind." "You could just tell me what the evil is." "If you really want to know, then fine. Its name is Hyperion." "Mind giving me an accurate description?" "Hyperion is effectively the spirit of destruction." "I thought that was Satan?" "Common mistake, he is my counterpart and rival." "So, continue about Hyperion?" "Sure. Hyperion has many servents across many universes, such as Tribalsniper." "Tribalsniper AIDS that guy?" "Correct, which means that Hyperion isnt the cause of the zombies." "Lemmie guess, a necromancer?" "Correct. He is also in the realm, and really should be in the Castle Crashers universe, so dont kill him outright." "I dont think even you could stop me, or my teammates, from killing him." "Just to remind you of who you are talking to, I am God." "Okay. Its been so long since the start of our conversation, I think my teammates are gonna start worrying." "They did so the moment you were sent here. Rainbow Dash found out as well." "Well, mind waking me up now?" "Okay. Just keep in mind what I have told you, and you should be able to know your enemy."

One moment later, I was back at "The Fort".

"Jou vere knocked out for ages! I though jou vere dead!" Schadenfreude yelled at me. "Nice to see you too." I replied, clearly indicating my disapproval of being yelled at. "Hope you have an excuse, outside of being tired, for not waking up earlier." Scorch added. "God told me just exactly what I was up against." I replied.

That was when I noticed that I wasnt human anymore.

"Lemmie guess, the device worked." I said, in light of this information. "Yep, but it did KO you for a ridiculous amount of time." Scorch replied.

Someone whacked the back of my head.

"Dont get knocked out for that long EVER AGAIN! I thought you were dead!" Rainbow Dash yelled at me. "If I had been dead, then explain why." I replied. "You werent breathing, you werent moving - usually that means you are dead." she said, slightly calmer now. "Not in my case." I stated, slightly suprised that she had been that concerned.  
>"If you end up like that again, I will make you WISH you had died." Rainbow warned.<br>"Just you yelling at me like that makes me wish that." I replied jokingly.

That was how my comrades found out, how I became a pony (Pegasus, luckily), and how I met God. 


	11. Discord

Chapter 10 - Discord

"Something is not right." I murmured quietly to myself.  
>"Probably a side effect of being ponified. I get that as well." Schadenfreude stated.<br>"What happened to your accent?" I asked in confusion.  
>"Ponification seems to have removed that." He replied.<p>

To be honest, Schadenfreudes ponified form actually suited him. He was a black-coated unicorn pony with red eyes, and his mane and tail were both a mix of black and red. What was most curious, though, was that he used both magic AND science, at the same time.

"Still, I am gonna raise my guard from now on." I said.

Something crashed through the roof, leaving a minor trail of blood.

"What the?" I asked, unable to continue, out of confusion.  
>"I agree. What the?" Schadenfreude added.<br>"Me also. What the?" Scorch, for that was who fell through the roof, continued.  
>"Scorch, why are you bleeding?" I asked.<br>"Some draconequus nearly killed me back up there." He replied, before rocketing skywards.  
>"Schadenfreude, get the others. I am going up there to see what is going on, and will probably need it." I said, following Scorch.<p>

After reaching the apparent height of where the battle had taken place, I had a look round.

"Scorch?" "Yeah?" "Exactly why were you up this high?" "I got lost in the everfree, so I rocketed up for a look."

Just then, something slammed into my back, VERY hard.

"You brought a friend with you? No matter." I heard a voice say. "Yes, he did, so exactly what is happening?" I yelled in its direction. "Lets see, your friend fell through the roof of your house, bleeding, and told you he was nearly killed? Figure it out for yourself." Was the reply.  
>"Just because you were sealed in a statue for a huge amount of time does NOT give you any right to randomly try to kill an innocent!" I yelled, twice as loud as before. "You are friends of the ones who locked me in the statue, so close enough." Discord replied.<br>"Shut up, Discord." I replied, this time with no emotion at all.

About that time, Rainbow Dash landed on a nearby cloud, Twilight hovered up nearby, and Schadenfreude teleported about 50 feet up in the air above Twi. From what I could see, Discord was wielding a massive battle axe, and wearing chainmail armor.

"Enough talk, have at you!" Everyone, including me, yelled out, and launched into combat. I unsheathed my katana, Schadenfreude got out his titanium bonesaws, Scorch ignited both his hands, Twilight began charging a spell, and Rainbow Dash flew up beside me. Discord responded to this by attacking Twi, but was promptly blocked by Schadenfreude. Scorch launched a barrage of flares, and I went for a decapacitating strike. The flares turned into chocolate milkshakes before evaporationg, and my attack was blocked forcefully enough to throw me back. A ball of magic shot past me, striking Discords chainmail armor directly and melting a small hole in it. Rainbow flew at Discord, presumably to knock him off balance, but he teleported out of the way and Dash crashed into a cloud.

"Time you were cut down to size." I said, voice basically made of liquid brutality, and my katana glowed red with power. Discord went for a disarming strike, but Scorch grabbed the back of the axe and threw it off course. The strike I followed with basically destroyed Discords remaining chainmail. By this time Rainbow had recovered, and flew at Discord, breaking the sound barrier on the way. Instead of teleporting out the way, he bashed her down towards "the fort". Ignoring all normal reasoning, I flew down after her, catching up quick enough to lie her down on a nearby cloud.

"Just try to stay alive." I told her. "I want to... help defeat... Discord." Rainbow Dash got out, coughing up a fair amount of blood in the process. "Maybe when he isnt being as lethal as he is now." I replied, noticing that my eyes were glowing red, mainly because of wherever I looked, I would see red. I flew back up to where the battle was taking place, just in time to see Schadenfreude brutally attacking Discord.

"Dont kill him outright, I want to do that!" I roared at Schadenfreude, then flew past him and slashed my katana straight through Discords right arm, severing it. Something about the scream of pain I heard sent adrenaline through me. I attacked again, this time catching Discords left eye, severing some of the connectors in his brain, then flew behind him and tore off both his wings. By now, he was very much dead, but I did not care, wanting only to utterly destroy him. As he fell to the ground, I noticed that I had turned a minor shade of grey, but disregarded it, flying down to destroy Discords lungs. He hadnt even hit the ground, and I tore out a good portion of his ribs, then slashed his heart into 2 bits. Content with this mutilation, I flew down back to the ground, darkness ate at the edges of my vision, and I fell unconscious again.

"Veteran, do you have any idea how powerful Discord was?" God asked me. "Yes, I did, but at the end of the day, he wasnt powerful enough." I replied, not fully recovered from "Rage mode". "Of course about 500 zombies arent powerful enough either, but did you turn them into giblets? NO!" God yelled.

Rage mode started to re-ignite.

"The destruction of Discord will echo across many, many universes, your own included." He added. "And, your point is? He got what he deserved." I replied. "You dont know what he did, therefore your judgement is void!" He countered. "I cant hear you over the sound of my own power!" I goaded. "Now you are just being ignorant. Why did you kill him, and not just seal him away?" "He attacked my comrades without any reason!" "So why didnt you kill him earlier?"

I looked directly at God.

"If he wanted to live, he shouldnt have attacked Dash."

I regained consciousness fairly quickly after that. Apparently, Schadenfreude had healed any injuries from everyone during the fight with Discord. Even the fact that I had been overhealed didnt help with what came next.

"I told you last time not to fall unconscious this long." Rainbow said, then came close to knocking my head off when she whacked me across the side of the head. That hit alone nearly sunk me back into unconsciousness, and she had barely even started.

Anyway, that how I lost my medical liscence. Yay, I just made a meet the medic reference. Now to serious chapter end.

Thats how Discord was defeated, how I discovered "rage mode", and how I annoyed god. Oh, and also how I got very seriously humiliated within seconds by Dash. 


	12. Response to reviews 1

Response to reviews 1.

Locoattack - Actually, I dislike my own grammar at times. The fusion mercs was an idea that originated from another fanfic, Waking Nightmares.

Chrimson banner - Veteran is the soldier, the medic is Schadenfreude. Maybe you misread that chapter?

Everyone else - Be a bit careful with your reviews, should you review this story, for it is my first story of any noteable qualities, and its not yet complete. I will try to respond to reviews when I see them. 


	13. Megachapter 1

Chapter 11 - Megachapter 1

(Unknown location)

"Enforcicle, Gruvich, go to the armory." Tribalsniper said, via commlink. He paused, before adding "and I dont care if you havent finished eating your damn sandvich!"

(Some time later, at the unknown locations armory)

"The ones I want dead arent going to fall to the zombies, so WE, as a team, will kill them personally!" the angry tribalman stated, to Enforcicle and Gruvich.  
>"Why are we still standing around, if you want them dead so badly?" Enforcicle asked.<br>"To be honest, I dont really have a reason! Perhaps so that you can FIND YOUR WEAPONS!" Tribalsniper yelled.  
>"I already found mine." Gruvich stated, holding a massive minigun, known as the Tomislav.<br>"I dont leave my gun in the armory." Enforcicle stated, pulling a small, white revolver, known as the Enforcer, out of one of his pockets. All three of the killers gave a small, grim chuckle.

(At "the fort")

"One who draws short stick, has to get what we need at the market." Scorch stated, holding a cup of straws.  
>"Just where did you get the cup?" I asked him.<br>"You seriously wouldnt care. Choices, people slash ponies!" Scorch announced in reply. Some time later, he was left holding the only straw considerably shorter then the rest.  
>"Suggestion - use a cup that ISNT made of glass." Schadenfreude said, as a slight joke. Scorch walked off, obviously not wanting to spend too much time getting things, and looking out for possible dangers.<br>"Any ideas what we do while waiting for him to get back?" I asked everyone.  
>"Dont ask how I got this, but..." Schadenfreude stated, getting a large XBox out of almost nowhere.<br>"You removed the only valid question, apart from my question, what games?" I stated, then asked.  
>"There arent many with multiplayer that we CAN play, but, how does halo - combat evolved sound?" He asked me.<br>"That is a seriously good idea. Only problem, we have to make sure EVERYONE agrees." I pointed out.

(A short time later)

"Oh, and how is this thing working?" I asked, as the XBox wasnt even being powered.  
>"Magic." Schadenfreude and Twilight replied simutaneously.<br>"Jinxed." Me and Rainbow dash said, also simutaneously.  
>"No, you." Schadenfreude replied, this time not simutaneously with ANYONEPONY.  
>"Lets just get to playing the game." Rainbow said, very impatiently.<br>The match started, a 2V2 match. I had gone for the gravity hammer and shotgun loadout, Rainbow was using an assault rifle and energy sword, Schadenfreude stuck with a needler and fuel rod, and Twilight stuck to a sniper rifle and pistol. Schadenfreude got first blood when he suprised me with the fuel rod, and was promptly slashed by Rainbows energy sword. After respawning, I charged out again, while Rainbow sent out some cover fire, throwing off Twilights aim. I managed to get close enough to land a 2-shot with the shotgun, then Rainbow fell to needle fire from Schadenfreude. I smacked Schadenfreude with my gravity hammer, got headshotted by Twilight, who was then owned with an assault rifle burst, courtesy of Rainbow dash, by which time I had got back to the battleground. Some random people started joining with loadouts of their own, and the battlefield descended into chaos. Someone whacked me with a pistol, who Rainbow killed with her energy sword, then I used my gravity hammer on another random person. Someone smacked me with an assault rifle, another person took them out with a shot from their sniper rifle, assault rifles sounded and that person dropped dead, and a fuel rod cannon blew all of them up. By this time, Scorch had gotten back, and joined as well, using a flamethrower and plasma pistol combo. Eventually, after many kills, deaths, headshots, 1-shots, and accidental teamkills, the match ended. Both teams were extremely close, but the team I was on had just enough of an advantage to win.

"That was some epic winning." Schadenfreude stated.  
>"I agree, despite the fact that I got killed multiple times, flamethrower needs a buff, and the plasma pistol is not very easy for me to use." Scorch agreed, with a minor rant tacked on.<p>

The door smashed down, revealing a group of 3. Tribalsniper was the only one I recognized, but Schadenfreude apparently knew the heavy, and Scorch knew the spy.

"So, you finally done with that match? I am tired of waiting." Tribal stated, eager to fight.  
>"Yes, we are, so, enough talk! Lets do this!" I replied.<br>"LEEROY JENKINS!" Scorch and the spy both yelled, simutaneously smashing one another in the neck.  
>"Idiots." both Schadenfreude and the heavy stated, both already trying to kill one another.<br>"This will be your last battle." me and Tribalsniper warned one another, and we began our battle.

Scorch set Enforcicle on fire, who used a spycicle to put out the fire, the latter retaliated by firing his enforcer, only to be blocked by the aura of fire surrounding the former.

Schadenfreude kicked Gruvich in the face, then rammed a titanium bonesaw far into the latters stomach, only for Gruvich to eat a sandvich, and crack Schadenfreude across the jaw with a critical hit, who answered with a syringe storm, meeting a bullet hail.

I parried a slash, and answered Tribal with a stab, who dodged the attack and kicked me in the chest, knocking me back a fair way, then I shot a quick slash across Tribals leg, getting first blood.

Enforcicle couldnt fool Scorch with his deadringer alone, but managed to get a backstab in, chilling Scorch for a short while.

Schadenfreude and Gruvich managed to get a critical blow on one another at the same time, resulting in Gruvich having his shoulder nearly sawn through, and Schadenfreude doing an involuntary backflip.

Tribalsniper stabbed an arrow at me, which I dodged, then retaliated with a high smash, crushing something in his shoulder, then he scored a deep stab wound that severed the middle of one of my ribs, which is not easy to do against a pony.

Scorch shot out a dual fire stream from his hands, almost imitating a super sayan, which impacted on Enforcicle, shoving the master of causing rage against a wall, and melting the spycicle once again.

Gruvich slammed Schadenfreude into the floor, the latter then severing the formers left leg, then stealing the sandvich that Gruvich tried to eat, using it for himself, only for Gruvich to nearly kill Schadenfreude with the tomislav.

I landed a solid blow with the back of my katana right on Tribals left eye, crushing his defence and allowing me to follow up with a normally lethal reaper slash, which was blocked by the latters razorback.

A critical hit from Enforcicles enforcer put Scorch in a state of major pain, but didnt kill him. Scorch responded with a lava burst, catching and disintegrating Enforcicles entire right arm, before using a hadouken to finish him off.

Schadenfreude slashed through Gruviches nearly sawn through shoulder with an ubersaw, then crushed his skull with a stone bust of the ancient greek Archimedes. I say the ancient greek Archimedes, because you cant really crush skulls with a stone bust of a dove with the habit of going where he shouldnt, can you?

"Just stay still!" Tribal roared in rage, before I got a lethal stab in, the blade of my katana going straight through his heart, as well as his spinal cord.

"Everyone OK?" I asked, slightly concerned, as the battle was full of nasty blows.  
>"Nothing my auto-regen cant handle." Schadenfreude replied, slowly recovering from nearly being killed.<br>"I think I am mostly OK, but it is frightening that I nearly froze over." Scorch replied, shaking slightly.

A horde of zombies, about 1336 strong, lead by a flying necromancer, stormed the building. I pulled out my shotgun, Scorch got out a RIFT fire axe, and Schadenfreude excused himself, deciding to check on the ponies. Scorch quickly followed Schadenfreude, and I followed soon after.

"Another zombie horde, you know what that means." Scorch said to Twi and Dash.  
>"Not just another zombie horde, but one backed up by a necromancer." Twilight pointed out.<br>"Fair point. Thing is, neither of you have any weapons, and there must be at least 1337 total enemies in the horde, so its time to run." Scorch replied.  
>"I would be one to agree, but they might just follow us." I butted in.<br>"So, its fight time?" everyone except me asked.  
>I pulled out a monocle and a top hat, then replied, "Exceedingly correct." before taking the top hat and monocle off.<p>

(Cue badly written preparation scene)

A reaper slash severed 7 zombies within about half a second, while syringes rained down, zombies falling in groups. A lava blast took out a fairly solid group of zombies, then shotgun bursts sounded, many more zombies falling. A bugle sounded, and a severe case of destruction ravaged the horde, tearing them down to only 1050 zombies.

"HOWS THE WEATHER OVER THERE, SCORCH?" I yelled out.  
>"CLOUDY WITH A GURANTEED CHANCE OF ZOMBIES, AND POSSIBLE FOREST FIRES!" he shouted in reply.<p>

A zombie wearing a fireproof suit got very close to Scorch, only to end up being severed many times.

"YOU CANT BE DAMN SERIOUS! FIREPROOF ZOMBIES?" Schadenfreude asked.  
>"YES, THEY ARE NOW FIREPROOF!" Scorch yelled in reply.<br>"NOT AXEPROOF APPARENTLY!" I shouted, in reference to how Scorch delt with one of the suited zombies.

The sound of a rocket launcher being fired caught my attention, and I looked over where the noise was.

"IF YOU ARE GOING TO USE THAT, BE VERY CAREFUL WITH IT!" I shouted, as a warning, to Rainbow dash, who had apparently found a rocket launcher.

The zombie horde was quickly worn down to low numbers, Scorch getting the highest kill count, and Schadenfreude, as he had to make sure none of us died, got the lowest kill count. Rainbow dash got 1 more kill then I did, mainly cause she had a rocket launcher, and because I let her. The necromancer descended, got out an obsidian claymore, and almost cleaved me in half, the only thing saving me being my katana. A rocket shot past my shoulder, crashing into the necro, flooring him. Schadenfreude took the opportunity to strike, but was denied by a hasty block. The necromancer had enough skill to take 3 of us on simutaneously, which resulted in a display of titanium, steel, and volcanic attacks against attacks of death. A gloved hand shoved Scorch backwards, and left me and Schadenfreude at a disadvantage, only for a critical rocket to slam the necromancer into the ceiling. Scorch got back up, I fired my shotgun at the necro, and Schadenfreude shot a magic missile at the necromancer, destroying the obsidian claymore. The necromancer fell back onto the floor, pulled out a longsword and shield, and continued the battle. A well-timed rocket shot past again, slamming the necromancer into the floor, which left me just enough time to get a reaper slash in, severing the necromancers shield arm. Scorch picked the necromancer up by the neck, threw him down on the ground outside, and hurled a molotov cocktail into the gap in the armor that had once been the necromancers entire left arm. As the fire burned the necromancer into an ash pile, I started thinking about events long passed.

"What are you thinking about, Vet?" Schadenfreude asked.  
>"Just thinking about events that happened long ago." I replied.<br>"List at least one of them." Schadenfreude told me.  
>"Remember the guy, I think he was called ChoZo?" I asked.<br>"Yes, I do actually remember."  
>"Well, I was wondering what would have happened if he hadnt been kicked off the team."<br>"That would have made a load of complications."  
>"After the events of today, I just need some time to myself." I decided, and walked over to one of the seats.<p>

I sat there alone for quite some time, before somepony came over.

"Why sit over here, all alone?" Rainbow asked me.  
>"I just felt like having a rest." I replied.<br>"I can sortta tell why you would want one." she said.  
>"Why are you over here?" I asked her.<br>"Just wondering why you were over here." Rainbow replied.  
>"I think there is something you arent telling me." I challenged.<br>"I havent told you, because it should be obvious enough." she said.  
>"If it was obvious, then why would I want to know?" I asked her.<br>"You probably want to know, because you are curious about it." she replied.

Without another word, she sat down beside me, and wrapped one wing over me. I felt comfortable enough to wrap one of my wings over her in return. Both of us stayed that way, before we looked into one anothers eyes, and kissed.

(This is partially a romance fic. What did you expect? Charlie shean references?)

Both me and Rainbow let the kiss drag on, enjoying the moment, and, seeing as it was night, fell asleep like that.

(Yay, megachapter. If you have something good to say about this chapter, feel free to review it. If you only have something bad to say about the chapter, then review it anyway. I give flame reviews to Scorch, so that he can burn them, mainly for entertainment purposes, but also to bring a new meaning to "flaming".) 


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